Dick would love to meet real Americans like himself. He is available to speak at community centers, local churches*, hospitals, elementary schools, prisons, military bases, Fortune 500 companies and other undisclosed locations. To set up a town hall meeting, please contact Dick at dick@cheneyforpresident.com. Dick is ready to shake your hand, kiss your baby, and take your donations!
See what others have been saying about Dick:
"I was sold on Dick Cheney’s health care plan when he simplified it for me: I’d be able to make more money while seeing less patients. And on top of that, he assured me that most of my patients would be white." Dr. Barry Goldstein, Burbank, CA
"I asked the Vice President when my son would come home from Iraq. He’s on his sixth rotation there. The Vice President told me that I was being selfish and un-American and that my son would be disappointed in me. He was right. For my youngest son’s 18th birthday we’re gonna have a party at the local recruitment office and sign him up to." Evelyn Adams, Wolf Point, Montana
“After a quick walk through of our facility, Dick gave us multiple pointers on how to save money on prisoner amenities and he gave us some innovative interviewing techniques that have helped us crack down on drugs in Cell Block D.” Warden Joel Sanders, Ellsworth, Kansas.
“When Dick Cheney informed me that I could get a 200% return on my investment by simply donating $100,000 to his campaign, I opened my checkbook right up.” John Young III, Tex/Mex Oil Industries, Dallas, Texas
“At first I was skeptical when our principal invited Dick Cheney to speak to our Elementary School. I was pleasantly surprised though when only about a third of the children had nightmares the night after the speech. Maybe Dick Cheney isn’t that bad.” Hannah Asher, Livingston, NJ
“My friends and I invited Mr. Cheney on a hunting trip with us. That dude shot the crap out of an endangered wolf using a P90TAC. It was awesome. We found like half a claw after he was done.” Ryan Miller, Sherbrooke, Maine
“For three decades I have been trying to put the fear of god into my congregation. Dick Cheney gave one, eighteen minute sermon and since then my flock have been perfect angels.” Reverend Dale Black, Bristow, Arkansas
“Dick Cheney was a straight shooter when he visited our VFW post. He told me all I had to do to get treatment for my PTSD from serving in Iraq was to re-enlist in the army for Afghanistan.” Sgt. Stephen Grundlewander, Tampa, Florida
“My whole life I thought it was my genes that made me gay. Little did I know that I choose to be this way and all I had to do was choose to start dating women. I can’t wait to get married now and have some real, non-adopted children.” Carl Bierman, New York, New York
*Mosques not included for security reasons. |
