Dick Cheney: No Doubt
On January 30, 1941 the world was given an early Valentine’s Day gift with the birth of Vice President Richard Bruce “Dick” Cheney. Dick’s birth certificate – which is located in his childhood home – proves that he was born in the United States of America in the town of Lincoln, Nebraska. Like the town’s namesake, Dick has devoted his life to saving the union. There is no doubt – Dick is an American.
Dick’s parents Marjorie Lorraine and Richard Herbert Cheney were true patriots. Both Marjorie and Richard were born in America. Read that again. They were both born in red, white and blue, America, not in Kenya or Indonesia or in some third world country where children are ingrained to hate our country. There is no doubt – Dick and his family love the USA.
As a young child, Dick’s family moved from Nebraska to Casper, Wyoming allowing Dick to further understand what it means to be a true American. At the age of eight, Dick fired a gun for the first time on a hunting trip with his father and bagged a one-year-old buck. Respecting the hunter’s tradition for a first time kill, Dick cut open the baby buck’s chest and took a bite out of its still beating heart. As Dick said, “The experience left me with an unwavering support for the right to bare arms and the lack of fear to spill blood.” There is no doubt – Dick is not yellow.
After graduating high school as both the valedictorian and man voted, “Best Looking,” Dick went on to Yale University. Unfortunately, Dick’s charisma and above average intelligence, did not mix well with the East Coast Ivy League Liberal agitators, resulting in Dick failing out. His experiences in New Haven with sex-craved, pill popping, communist elitists would harden Dick’s resolve to put America back on the right path. There is no doubt – Dick is not an Ivy Leaguer.
Dick continued his educational career in his home state, where he received a Bachelor of Arts and a Master of Arts in Political Science. He later began his doctoral studies at the University of Wisconsin and stayed just long enough to receive the five Vietnam War deferments he needed to elude combat. While other American youth were having the time of their lives in Saigon, DaNang and the Mekong Delta, Dick was hunkered down in the library trying to envision ways to make his slacker fellow Americans in Southeast Asia a better home when they returned. There is no doubt – Dick is selfless.
Like many successful politicians, in 1962, Dick was convicted of driving while intoxicated. But this wasn’t some selfish doing like in Massachusetts, it was an act of protest against the pot smoking hippies who wanted America to lose the Vietnam War. Dick, always one to stand up for what’s right, enacted his protest again in 1963 when he was arrested once more for driving under the influence. As Dick said at the time, “The only thing I’m under the influence of is Freedom of Speech.” There is no doubt – Dick will stand up for real American values. More
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